Leaving Sydney

I had finally gained enough strength to move out of the 'Great Aussie Backpackers' in Kings Cross. Actually I am giving myself a little too much credit, my mind was made up for me. I returned the previous evening to find the Swedish invasion had grown in number. There were now five of my Scandinavian friends in the ants nest of room number one. Jan was lying chest downwards on the floor. He was being straddled by yet another good looking blonde thing receiving a full body massage, baby oil and all. My thoughts of two young Swedish ladies quickly evaporated and I gave a quick “hello” whilst facing the floor.

In this situation you think you would just stare but in reality you look away and curse under your breath 'you lucky bastard'. So that was the final straw - if they were not handing out free Swedish style massages then I was outta there. So where next? Kings Cross was not an option so the city it was. After going in and enquiring about prices at various places I decided to treat myself to Wakeup. Exactly ten dollars more than the Swede ant infested Great Aussies but a world of difference. This was more like a hotel, new in design and rather funky. It was here you get the 18-20 year old daddies paying lot. You see most older people will resent paying that bit extra but when it's on Gold Card who cares.

The clientele proved my theory. They were all young, posh and mostly English. This place certainly catered for those not used to being away from home. The floors were colour coded - Floor one, blue and called Europe. Floor two, red and Africa. You had a card which opened all the doors - it was ever so flash. I noticed most people put their door keys around their neck as if to stay “I'm staying at wakeup, the nicest hostel in Sydney”. It was like being back at school. The signs on the telephone read 'cheap calls when you are homesick'. The kitchen sink had a poster saying 'Your mum is not here to do the washing up now so clean up after yourself'. This place was nice. It was clean. It was easy. Unfortunately it lacked any character as it was full of bus loads of Aus Experience school leavers. Everything was a little more expensive as well. I was starting to think back to Kings Cross..... are the ants going to cope without me?...... are the Swedes going to run out of baby oil?........are Sven and Ulrika ever going to stop kissing?